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2003-08-12 - 3:29 p.m.
dear diary,
nothing says "i love you jodi foster" like a gunshot to the president.
i was gonna try out "nothing says 'i love you jodi foster' like a sperm-stained copy of 'catcher in the rye'" but i wasn't sure if you were that high brow, diary.
dear diaryland user,
1980something called and they want their reference back.
sincerely,
played out snappy comeback
dear diaryland user,
jd salinger called and he requested that you never reference his material and sperm in the same sentence.
sincerely,
the woodland dwarves that protect jd salinger's invisible fortress