2003-10-17 - 11:23 a.m.
dear diary,
1. Name five things in your refrigerator.
since nothing in the fridge is mine right now, save for the britta water pitcher, i have a much better story about how i was seventeen and house sitting for my dad and doing lines of speed off of his glass coffee table while patting myself on the back for being deliciously 80's in a growing pains sitcom kind of a way. i explored his refrigerator and found about 100 cans of film, that actually had film in them. my dad freezes weird things, like chocolate, batteries... and check books. i opened up the check books and found some bright green frozen BUDS DUDE. [see: hippy speak for marijuana] for some reason frozen pot and lines of meth led to an eventual overdose, but not before hours of really interesting paranoid delusions. [see: spiders]
2. Name five things in your freezer.
see #1. although, i do have some eggo waffles and ice cream in there, and those are mine. oh and some italian ices too. and popsicles. and frozen pizzas. and kid's cuisines. dammit i'm hungry.
3. Name five things under your kitchen sink.
mouse shit. carpet cleaner. a have-a-heart mouse trap with one fuzzy cracker in it. one of my alloy pots that SOMEONE put under the sink to catch the leaking water, before i had to screw on a pair of balls and use a ratchet to make it stop dripping. for some reason the very expensive sauce pot has not been moved or cleaned.
4. Name five things around your computer.
i guess this could get a little embarassing. two empty ramen cups. two used forks. 1 package of lightbulbs. one empty plastic bottle of what used to be apple juice. an ashtray. a cardboard music box called "the dancing clown" which actually contains a dancing clown. a ceramic music thing with a bunch of clowns on it and a tiny little magnetic porcelain clown that spins on another magnet to create the look of iceskating or something to that effect. and a bob's big boy bobble head. i like clowns, sue me.
5. Name five things in your medicine cabinet.
clowns. a miniature rubber ducky. some SHI perfume that i rarely wear because it was a really nice gift and the bottles are wicked awesome. and lots of other normal things like preparation h, icy hot, dr scholl's male-itch-be-gone, the remnants of a gel pad, toothpaste, brill cream, switchblade combs.