2003-08-01 - 5:42 p.m.
dear diary,
i've done a friday five just for you.
1. What's one thing you've always wanted to do, but never have?
i've always wanted to have some kind of a cancer and then beat it through chemo and tough love only in that i'd have an excellent excuse to use for everything in my life that i didn't want to do. "i'm not up for cooking you breakfast hon, i think my cancer is acting up again." or "no sir, i did not get a chance to finish that report for you because last night i was feeling especially cancerous."
2. When someone asks your opinion about a new haircut/outfit/etc, are you always honest?
i guess i've been lucky in that no one ever asks for my opinion about anything that superficial.
3. Have you ever found out something about a friend and then wished you hadn't? What happened?
i actually found out recently that a friend of mine, who is now 26 or 27 at least, is a shoplifter. what happened? nothing happened. i was really surprised because he and i have always connected on so many levels and ideas we agree upon; i thought we shared the same morals in the least. apparently we don't. so i guess that the "what happened" is that we never bring it up lest i go into a psychoanalysis rampage on his ass.
4. If you could live in any fictional world (from a book/movie/game/etc.) which would it be and why?
i think i'd like to live in willy wonka's chocolate factory, but, and there is a big but - it would have to be willy wonka's chocolate factory like how i saw it when i was a kid, not how i see it now. when i see it now, all i can think about is how fake the chocolate filled balloons look, and how cheesy the m&m tree is, and the whipped cream in the mushroom etc etc. but when i was a kid... i wanted to live out all of my fat dreams in that factory. i had my route planned out. first i'd hit the tree because m&m's are small, you can't really fill up on those. i'd do some gummy work next, because it also can't fill me up. hit the whipped cream, grab a lolli for later, and then go to town on the chocolate and the drinking up the lake. then right before my chocolate induced nap, i'd eat the hell out of that daffodill flower and cup that good old willy sips from and then bites.
5. What's one talent/skill you don't have but always wanted?
i have always wanted to have the power to be invisible. i currently do not have this skill. but i used to imagine being invisible and going to school and spying on people during class, so i could go back the next day and repeat whole conversations to them and tout myself as the psychic of blankety blank highschool or blankety jr high.
i'd have to keep this a secret now, at my age, only because i have no interest in being captured and used by the government for tactical missions etc.
now that i think about it though, i'd also have to have the skill/talent of being able to teleport to anywhere i wanted. because it would suck mad dick to be invisible and have to walk everywhere. fuck that noise, i'd have to just be able to tap my nose and beam down to wherever/whenever. maybe time travel should be included in this talent/skill. i might need more time to contemplate this. i'll get back to you diary.